Meeting one's "idol" is a tricky thing. Often, unfortunately, something happens that cools the experience. So it was with some trepidation that I faced meeting Lynda Carter in early May 2007. Lynda was set to make her cabaret "re-debut" at San Francisco's The Plush Room, and I was going to attend the first two days of the concert and get to finally meet her in person.
The final part of the preceding sentence may surprise those who know I've interviewed Lynda before, most famously for her longest interview ever (in Back Issue #5), for The Advocate, and more recently for Bay Area Reporter newspaper and Instinct magazines. And I shared time with her on the Wonder Woman Season Two DVD documentary. However, all of our interaction to date had been over the phone. This would be in person.
The trip to San Francisco was hellish, to say the least. I traveled with my secondary partner, Paul Smalley, and he drove most of the way. But what should have been a 10-hour trip took a staggering 14-15 hours, and we arrived late in the afternoon. We were exhausted, but the concert was in hours, so we prepped and primped to get ready, to make sure that we looked out best. I was in a black tuxedo and tails, Paul was in a vintage brown 1920-era suit and hat. I made sure I had all my gifts for Lynda prepped and ready, and we departed.
After much confusion due to one-way streets and the bizarre SF address system, we finally arrived at The Plush Room, and I checked in with the maitre 'd. There was a line to get in of about ten people, but since I was attending tonight as press, we were supposed to have reserved seating. Inside the rather cozy room (read: small - 110 seats or so), the lights were dim, and the seats were about 1/3 filled. The owner of The Plush Room directed us to our seats, which were to the right side of the stage, on the balcony area. Not what I would have expected for press, but he assured me that it was the best acoustically (we were to find out that he was entirely correct).
We took the foremost seats in the press area, then chatted briefly with Steve Murray from Cabaret Scenes, who was seated behind us. Several other press people came in, but none were friendly. A pair of guys sitting behind Steve were decidedly unfriendly, and, as proven later, were not really attending to enjoy themselves. Some local TV personality was pointed out to me as well.
Although I knew there were Wonder Woman fans in the audience, none introduced themselves to me. Only two people were wearing WW paraphernalia (one in a bootleg Lynda t-shirts, which I found particularly cheeky). Almost nobody was dressed in suit and tie, and I was the only one in a tuxedo, until the band came out.
At two minutes after 8pm, with the room at 95% capacity, they closed the doors and dimmed the lights. The band took to the stage: Sam Kriger was at a piano on the left side (stage right), then Josh Workman on guitar. Behind him was Andrew Higgins on bass, then Jim Zimmerman on drums. Finally, Musical Director Johnny Harris (who had worked on Wonder Woman and all of Lynda's TV specials and Vegas concerts) entered, on the right (stage left) at a large keyboard. A large music stand in front of Workman held a book with Lynda's name on it, and a central microphone was in place. An announcement was made about Razz Productions and future concerts, then a request to turn cell phones off and an admonishment for no flash photography or recording. "We now ask you to enjoy this evening's performance," the lightly accented announcer said, and the music started.
"Do I love you, oh my, do I? Honey, 'deed I do…" Lynda's voice came over the sound system, but she wasn't yet onstage. It took the audience a moment to realize that she was entering from the side of the room (about fifteen feet from where I was sitting), and walking through the audience toward the stage. As the music kicked up, Lynda arrived at the stage, dressed in a long black skirt and a long-sleeved white shirt. Her hair was almost a jet black, and she had a tastefully flashy necklace and earring set on. The audience went wild, applauding and cheering, several on their feet.
Lynda's first number was "Deed I Do," after which she welcomed the audience, and basked in more applause. She then remarked that it had been a long time since she had performed in San Francisco, relating she had been 17 years old, and that it had been 20 years since she had last sung in a nightclub. She then launched into a slow and jazzy version of "God Bless The Child," during part of which she "scatted," losing her composure once and laughing. Afterwards, she told the audience that the first time she had sung that song she had been wearing a crown and a banner as Miss USA 1972. She then talked about having labels all of her life, including Wonder Woman, mother, friend, etc.
She introduced her next song by talking about playing Rita Hayworth in The Love Goddess, then launched into "Put The Blame On Mame," a sexy, slinky number that she emphasized by cocking her hips and waggling her shoulders. She segued from that into the slower "Summertime," her vibrato coming out stronger than on other songs. From there, she launched the peppy "Hit Me With A Hot Note," during which she referred regularly to her music book (as the lyrics are quite tricky). At one point, she made up a new lyric to one line on the spot ('when saxes flare up, give me a… something … to put my hair up"), and chuckled a bit about it afterwards, reminding the audience it had been twenty years since she'd performed live.
Lynda then talked about what Wonder Woman had brought to her life, allowing her to do her musical specials and other performing in Vegas and elsewhere. "She really did give me everything," Lynda said, at which point a female audience member yelled out "and vice versa!" Lynda let the cheers die down and said, "Well, I really did want to endow that character with…" then noticed the audience snickering at her unintentional pun. "Oh my god, we'll have to put that in the act. Oy vey!" she joked. "
She then introduced Johnny Harris, who she had first seen working in Vegas with Sonny and Cher. After all these years, when she returned to the stage, she asked to work with Harris again, and here they were. Harris had worked together the medley which Lynda then performed, with bits of "The Way You Look Tonight," "The Very Thought Of You," and "As Times Goes By" mixed together.
Lynda then said that she was astonished with the next song that Paul Simon (of all people) had written a seduction song. Lynda had performed it on a special years ago, and chose it because it was a peppy song. She wanted the audience to picture a woman sitting at the bar crying, when a man sitting next to her gave some advice (perhaps due to the largely gay audience present, Lynda changed this a bit for the second night - see below) about "Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover." She had much fun with this number, pulling some comedic expressions along the way. She segued into "Fever" then, the audience happily clapping along to the opening vamp until Lynda sang. She scatted a bit during this song as well, back-and-forthing with the piano player.
Lynda spoke about James Taylor being a "real American poet," and said that the next song really represented her philosophy of life. "Secret O' Life" sounded the most like vintage Lynda, almost resembling a number from her Portrait album. Afterwards, Lynda thanked the audience for making her feel so comfortable after being away from the stage for such a long time. She then talked about her mother raising her in Arizona and playing her a lot of Billie Holiday, Ella Fitzgerald and Patsy Cline. She also then pointed out her son, Jamie, in the center of the audience, noting that she had stopped performing onstage when she became pregnant with him, but since he was now almost twenty, she had come back to it. She noted that this was the first time he had ever seen her perform live. She then introduced the song, "Blues In The Night," noting that her mother had sung it to her as a child.
Lynda then joked about whether there were any country western fans in the audience, and launched into the Patsy Cline-standard "Crazy," then immediately went into the more melancholy "Cry Me A River." Afterwards, the drummer launched the seven-hit that is recognized as "shave and a haircut, two bits." Lynda told about first hearing the song at the Elks Club as a small child, where she used to swim as a child and buy hot dogs from a vendor who used the phrase. She later learned that the song had been put to some very fast tongue-twisting lyrics. Putting her music book closer to her, she promised to do her best, and launched into "Cloudburst." The song is blazingly fast, and Lynda got through it with nary a missed word, an impressive feat given the lyrics that were more complex than most Sondheim songs.
Afterwards, Lynda introduced the band, each of whom got their own round of applause. Lynda then introduced her husband in the audience, Robert Altman, who was seated next to Jamie. As if planned that way, her next song was "My Heart Belongs To Daddy," a saucy Cole Porter number that Lynda played with both sweetness and flirtatiousness. Afterwards, consulting her notes, Lynda crossed over to the piano to sing a very sad song called "Where've You Been," that had many audience members dabbing tears from their eyes.
After thanking the audience again, Lynda's final song was a medley with "Come Rain or Come Shine" and " Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man." At the end, the band vamped while Lynda bowed and the audience gave her a standing ovation. Lynda left the stage and exited to her dressing room, took a quick swig of water, then joked that Kenny Rogers had a saying about encores: "It's all such bullshit. You just go over and touch the wall and come back."
Lynda then pointed out her husband again, and said he had personally asked her to perform the finale number as her encore, telling everyone that she had used to close her shows with the number. She dedicated the number to her "honey," and then sang "Always." The audience were on their feet again afterwards as Lynda was helped off the stage by several fans, and waved her final goodbye to the audience.
Having been promised a minute or two to meet Lynda after the show by her manager, Scott Stander, I waited with Paul near the entrance to the dressing room area. The band and their family streamed in, plus Lynda's family, and several other VIPs (including a thin blond woman about Lynda's age who I knew I'd seen in pictures with her before but couldn't place).
Finally we were led into the crowded reception area in back. I stood by while Lynda made her way among the well-wishers, spending time with each. Finally, she noticed Paul and I standing out like well-dressed sore thumbs in our tuxedo and suit, and said hello. Scott Stander introduced me as the guy who had interviewed her recently, and she recognized my name, and some personal details I had related. I started giving her a passel full of gifts, first showing her that under my tuxedo I was wearing a paid of gold Wonder Woman bracelet replicas. I gave her a set that had been beautifully wrapped in colored cellophane by my primary partner, Don Hood, which she liked.
I also gave her a copy of the Wonder Woman Day poster for the charity event I produced last year which raised $15,000 for women and children's shelters. She promised she'd do something for this year's event. I gave her a pair of numbered (#10) and signed 12x18 prints by Paul Guinan that had been done for the event, which gorgeously delineated her in both phases of her Wonder Woman career. She was astonished by the artistry and declared them beautiful.
I then mentioned I had a particularly positive tabloid appearance for her. She got a look of horror on her face and said "Oh my God, it's not the National Enquirer story is it?" She remembered that I had asked her about the particularly nasty and memorable Enquirer story for the Back Issue interview, and began telling some friends nearby how awful the Enquirer had been to her. I then showed her that it was instead my Weekly World News column in which I had done a story about Princess Deanna of the Femizons, who had become the lesbian super heroine Fabulous Femme. The artist had altered DC's "Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman" statue, changing stars to triangles, the tiara star to a lambda, put two Fs on the chest instead of an eagle, and given her sunglasses, a motorcycle helmet, and an invisible motorcycle. Lynda roared with laughter.
Finally, I gave her two photos of the infamous Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman mannequin as seen on this site. I had told her about it years ago, but she had never seen it finished. Her jaw dropped and she squealed. "Oh my God!" She grabbed the photos and held them up. "Look at this! Oh my God!" she said excitedly, showing everyone in the room. She ran into the private area of her dressing room, where her husband and son were, and showed them. "You should get one of those, Mom," Jamie said.
With time short, I had Lynda autograph one of the Guinan prints for me, and the other for my parent's Miracle of America Museum in Polson, Montana. I then posed for a picture with her. "Can I put my arm around your waist?" I asked, as she had put hers around mine. She laughed and said "Sure." Afterwards, she signed something for Paul, and I took a picture of them. Then, we were ushered out along with everyone else so Lynda could have time with her family.
We went to the lobby, where I finally met Mark Meader of Wonderland, and decided that with his white beard and jolly demeanor, he was secretly Santa Claus in disguise. I also met several other fans, including a lady named Mia who was over the moon about seeing Lynda, and gave out copies of the Wonder Woman Day poster to the nice ones. Suddenly, the lobby erupted in excitement as Lynda and her group exited to come out through the lobby and head to dinner. Lynda graciously signed autographs and posed for pictures, as the mob pressed in closer and closer. I spotted Jamie to the side, and asked, "What do you think of all this?" "Pretty overwhelming," he responded. After a few minutes, Lynda finally got outside, and was loaded into a stretch limo and whisked away. Paul and I had a few cookies that were set out for the opening night guests, chatted with Mark and a woman named Mia for a bit, then went back to where we were staying.
The following night, we dressed only a bit differently. I was in a more traditional tux with a silver-brocaded vest and a jeweled bowtie, and Paul wore another vintage suit. We were also bringing with us one of our hosts for the weekend: SF City Commissioner John Caldera, who looked dapper in a dark suit and long coat, his hair pulled back into a ponytail. We arrived a bit after 7pm, having arranged with the owner and Scott Stander that we would have the best seats in the house reserved for us, immediately in front of center stage.
Imagine my dismay to learn that the owner had NOT saved the seats. Instead, we were seated to the far right of the stage, near the dressing room door and Johnny Harris. We were in front of the speakers, so acoustically they were not good seats, though we could actually hear Lynda's "live" voice more clearly. Immediately in front of us were a charming and handsome pair of men; Mark Padilla and Johnny Freedom. Mark was an artist who had a particularly nice poster of Lynda he had done with Johnny, and the pair had a comic book to show that was partially inspired by Wonder Woman. I told them I would try to get them a chance to see Lynda and give it to her, and then OKed that with Scott Stander.
The second night's performance was much the same as the first, but there were some differences, mostly in the between-songs patter. Lynda wore a different white shirt (this one with a distracting floppy collar) and a different black skirt and jewelry. I'll note the other changes following.
After " God Bless The Child," Lynda said that someone had stolen her songbook from the previous night. The audience booed. "If you ever see it floating around, you can take them to task," she said sternly. Later, while introducing " Put The Blame On Mame" her mic went out. "If we have to, we'll do it acapella," she said, as the mics were quickly traded out (twice, before a working mic was found). In the lyrics, she screwed up with "the fire in San Francisco" and quickly corrected herself to say "earthquake."
Lynda then related a story about performing "Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover" on a musical special as a number with the White House Marine Corps and their twirling bayonettes, and the near accident that she caused by walking too slowly. Then, perhaps realizing that her audience was even gayer than the night before, she said about the song, "I want you to picture in your mind, a woman sitting at a bar, or a guy sitting at a bar, crying his eyes out, to another guy, or, a girl…" at which point she shrugged, and the crowd erupted in screams and cheers. Then, making another comment about "a guy and another guy," she launched into the song.
Before she sang "Secret of Life, " Lynda diverged a bit talking about how the performer who did the next song did a lot of Democratic fundraisers, and revealed her own leftish political leanings. She also related that she had been asked in an interview here in San Francisco which one of Wonder Woman's powers she would want. "And I said, 'The lasso of truth. And I'm gonna throw it around Dick Cheney's head!'"
This second night, when she introduced Jamie, he shouted out "Love you Mama!" She didn't hear him and asked him to repeat it, and he shouted it louder, making the audience applaud. She said that he was "quite the musician himself," then said that she loved him so much, and whisper-asked the audience "Did I embarrass him enough?"
Prior to singing "Blues In The Night," she also mentioned that her mother was a "pistol" and in addition to the others named the first night had also played calypso music by Harry Belafonte. Later, when it came time to introduce the band, Lynda blanked on the piano player's name until he whispered it. She apologized, and he said, "That's OK, Betty!" Lynda and the audience laughed.
Just before her final medley, a gent in the front row begged her to sing "Toto." Lynda explained to the audience that "Toto" was a song she had written for her album Portrait. Most of the audience knew that, and erupted into applause. After much egging on, and after warning that she couldn't sing the whole song because the band didn't know it, Lynda sang the first verse of "Toto" a capella. It was beautiful, and several people stood to applaud after the short snippet. Finally, during the encore, she asked the audience to sing along with her.
Going backstage the second night was similar to the first night, though there were significantly less people. Although we were warned that Lynda wanted to spend time with her family (they were leaving the next morning), she was just as pleasant with those who got the privilege to go backstage as she had been the first night. One gent had won a chance to meet her backstage at an AIDS auction, paying around $600 for the opportunity. He showed her pictures of himself — dressed as Wonder Woman — at age five. She laughed and showed her friends.
Mark Padilla also related to her about Wonder Woman being the first thing he drew as a child, and he and Johnny gave her the art poster and an ashcan comic they had produced. She then took a picture with them, and met our host, John Caldera, chatting with him briefly and signing a poster for him. Paul and I had printed 8x10s of the photos we had taken with Lynda the night before, and she signed those to us, then one of the concert posters for Paul. She then excused herself to go be with her family, and we exited.
As the fans waited in the lobby for Lynda to exit again, I chatted with several of them, showing photos and comparing notes and thoughts. Paul came in from outside to announce that Lynda and her family had exited through a side door this time and been whisked off in the limo already. The fans were disappointed not to have a chance to meet Lynda personally or get her autograph, but most understood.
The next day, while shopping at Amoeba Records and A Different Light bookstore, I ran into two other concert attendees who I had given posters to, and we chatted. All of us had the same opinion; not only had Lynda put on a tremendous show, but she had been warm, funny, and personable while doing it. She also looked fantastic, nowhere near the 56 years of age she was (and with nary a sign of plastic surgery at all). Everyone felt as if she had indeed been a "wonder woman" onstage, and had lived up to their expectations.
Which is how I felt after meeting her: Beautiful, graceful, talented, and caring. Lynda Carter was - and IS - a wonder.
